I see you

This past Father's Day was a weekend that I will never forget.

It was hard for many reasons. Not only was it the first Father's Day without my father, but a very dear friend of mine died that Friday night. I was standing in my kitchen with Tim, the boys, and my brother-in-law when I got the text.

I still get goose-bumps just thinking about it and I still can't bring myself to post about her passing. Somehow it just hasn't felt right. Her death affected my deeply and blogging about it doesn't feel like enough somehow.

The day after she died, some friends brought over a bunch of food for us. It was a haul. Burritos for Tim's lunch, a huge salad with loads of extra fresh herbs from their garden, a delicious dinner, and warm - yes, warm - rhubarb bread. Amazing. There was probably more, it was so much food. She had clearly been hard at work all day.

With the food, my dear (prayer warrior) friend included a note that I could read later on. I remember that it was typed, which still makes me smile. Her handwriting isn't that bad. :)

I tear up just thinking about it. The gist of the note was this.

I see you. This is your first Father's Day 

without your dad and your (our) friend just died. 

I see you. I see the pain and I see you.

Praise God for friends willing to be the hands and feet of Jesus.

We didn't need the food. It was timely and so helpful, but we didn't need it.

I needed that note. 

And I needed to feel seen by someone who knows what it is to suffer, someone who was suffering with me.

As I was remembering that weekend a few days ago, the Lord reminded me of this truth: that is always His note for us. He always sees us. Always. And he knows what it is to suffer. And He sees us when we suffer.

So now, every time I play "peek-a-boo I see you" with my boys, I will remember that God sees me.

And I will try to be more aware of who I need to see, of who I need to be hands and feet to in their suffering. Let's do it together!