Twin Survival Tips - this one takes the cake

I am going to give you my top survival tip for having twins, hands down.

No question about it, there's no competition, and it's not what you think.

flashing gang signs at breakfast, never a dull moment :)

Are you ready?

Become a runner.

That's it.

That's all I got.

Either get faster or get some serious endurance power. And don't worry, if you, like me, weren't already a runner before you discovered you were pregnant with twins, there's still plenty of time to get in appropriate shape before they are mobile. But I cannot overstress this enough.

Appropriate shape in my "twin world" qualifies as being able to sprint a city block and still have some steam left once you catch a twin at the end of that city block. Because as you carry that one back, jogging, you will need to re-catch the other twin and then carry both back to the safety of your yard while they kick and scream and put on a lovely show for the neighbors.

Not that this happened to me tonight. Purely hypothetical. Lord have mercy.

We've started taking the boys for regular walks and using that time to train them to listen quickly and learn a few things about street safety. This process takes a lot of attention and intentionality from both of us. It cannot be done with only 1 parent.

But Tim was working late and the boys were begging all day to go for a walk. It was almost time to go inside, but since I needed to return something to our neighbor anyway, I thought, what the hey? I think that should be fine, we're just gonna pop over to his house, drop it off, pop back home, sure thing. Besides, they've been getting better at listening.

I must have been experiencing an exhaustion high b/c I have no idea I was thinking.

"Popping over" went great. "Popping back," not so great. As we're teaching them to learn to listen, we want to give them a little freedom to experience what it feels like to know they have a choice to make. Well, sometimes freedom backfires.

So when a twin started running away, I called him back sternly and gave him a moment to respond. His response was to run faster.

So what do you do when the other twin then takes off in the opposite directions down the street. Well, you go for the slowest twin, stick him in the yard and foolishly think he'll stay there (since he has figured out how to open the gate latch). Then you thank God in Heaven that you've been running 4 times a week as you sprint after the other twin. In flip-flops. And no sports bra. (Just being real.)

Perhaps my next tip will be to always wear running shoes, although that's one tip I'll never follow. As practical as that would be, I just can't do it. Guess I'll be running in flips :)

5 Minute Favorite Quote Friday

This week I am taking a tip from my lovely friend Monica over at 

Elevate Ideas (LOVE her blog) and I am doing Favorite Quote Friday in 5 minutes.

Ready, go!

My quote for you this week is from my amazing husband, Tim.

"Thin does not equal beautiful."

My wise husband started saying this to me early on in our relationship and with good reason. It was something I didn't believe; I was always comparing myself to someone who I saw as skinnier than me. I still struggle with this. Only now, I compare myself  to the skinnier version of me. Because back then, I was skinny. I just didn't know it.

Sure wish I had enjoyed it more :)

In a world where babies, grief, and stress happen, and "bouncing back" doesn't always happen as fast as we want it to, our waistline and our self esteem can take a hit. Especially when we don't see ourselves properly.

there I was on my wedding day, just hanging with the ladies, being all skinny and not even knowing it 

Tim still says this to me sometimes, and by God's grace, I am still learning to believe it. I'm also practicing the art of being thankful for my body, dare I say, just the way it is.... With this healthy body that God has given me, I can run 4 miles and feel great. I can carry both of my twins at the same time, for extended periods. I can have giant, healthy babies with this body - 2 at a time! I can keep up with my boys at the park. I can live a full and active life. Even if I still have 10lbs+ to lose before I am back to my "pre-baby" weight. The twins are 2 now....I don't think its classified as baby weight anymore.

Do I wish this body were a little slimmer? Sure I do. So I'm making healthy decisions one day at a time, for me and my family. But I'm also trying to enjoy it (my life, my body) right now without feeling guilty about it. My boys don't care if my tummy is squishy and I don't fit into my old skinny jeans. I do  fit into my new skinny jeans.  :)  And my husband knows that thin doesn't equal beautiful. 

Do you?

(Ok, it took me more than 5 minutes to write this...don't know how you do it, Monica!:)

hello neighbor, do you like pie?

We've lived in our neighborhood over 2 years now and sadly, have never met our neighbors across the street. So, I went out and bought a pie. It was time to introduce ourselves. Especially under the circumstances.

Everybody likes pie, right?

Based on friendly, totally UN-stalker like neighborly observations, we were pretty sure that someone in their family had recently died. We figured the time had come to introduce ourselves and pay our respects. We found ourselves wondering if it had been their son, a child confined to a wheelchair, that they'd had to say goodbye to.

So I bought a huge pie from Costco and we were on the lookout to find a time when it looked like they were home.

It took 2 days, and quite a bit of self control with that pie, but the time had come, they were home. Let's go! Our children were dirty and barefooted and looked like urchins, but Tim needed to head out the door to church and if I had to wait another day or 2, I might need to buy a new pie.

So we traipsed over.

Only mom and 4 kids were home, but sure enough, the eldest son, their 13 yr. old, had passed away. It was an emotional introduction and a little awkward, given the language barrier, but I'm so thankful we went. And now we know their names.

I don't tell you this story as a way to pat myself on the back, but as an encouragement for all of us to be willing to appear awkward in order to love on someone we don't know, someone who we know is hurting. Beth Moore called this the "dignity of notice" in one of her Bible study videos and it has stuck with me. We all want to be noticed, especially when we're hurting.

4 morning glories, in honor of the 4 little ones who are dearly missed

That day when we met our nieghbors was a significant day as it was also the "angelversary" for 3 little ones that were members of dear families in our circle of friends. It was a day to remember, a day to grieve, and a day to give thanks for God's goodness in the midst of it all.

Again, this I know, God is enough.

He is always enough.

A Day in The Life: Grocery Shopping

A Day in The Life is a series on life with twins. Just a 

few glimpses of what its like to function as a family of

five when two of us are two. :)

these are not my twins. although, they do bear a striking resemblance!

I am often asked what its like to grocery shop with twins. For anyone who has 3 littles close in age, grocery shopping with all three can be a challenge. Just like swimming the English Channel could be a challenge for someone who only dog paddles. It takes forever and each and every time you emerge from that proverbial chamber of tortures you wipe the sweat off your brow and swear to yourself never.ever.again.

For all you historians out there, grocery shopping has always been something I have done without Tim. I've never worked full time since we've been married and so I always had the time to get it done while he was at work. That was still very true when I only had 1 little guy to take with me. Easy-peasy. We would run errands, hit garage sales, go thrifting, you name it, Jackson and I were heavy hitters when it came to a productive work day! 

Then came the twins. The first year with twins, I couldn't go to any "normal" stores like Cub or Rainbow unless we all went - no double carts. I mainly shopped at Costco b/c they were literally the only store that had a cart large enough for 2 baby seats, 1 toddler (who was still learning how NOT to run away) and oh, yeah, all my food diapers. 

A few times, I did find the nerve to venture out to a store without a suitable cart and then I would strap on one twin, put the other baby seat in the large part of the cart, and have the big one sit in the child part. Then I could only buy a few things and they had to fit in packed carefully around the sleeping twin. Gallon of milk? No way, not gonna fit.

Another coping mechanism I used a lot was the 1 mom, 2 carts, 3 kid parade. Only this parade don't give out no candy. We just move very slowly and get in everyone's way every chance we get. Awesome.

Oh and don't forget that now you have 2 (or maybe 3) pairs of tiny hands that are grabbing for things you don't plan to buy. Like that bag of marshmellows that tiny 2 is chewing on through the bag. You wrestle that away from him while breaking up the hair pulling fight in the other cart and put "gently used" marshmellows back on shelf...or maybe you just buy them b/c you are going to need them after this trip. You turn around only to discover that tiny 1 is also chewing on a bag of marshmellows. Needless to say, you buy both bags and start pushing/pulling your carts down center of aisle, which other customers love. Obviously.

At this point, you begin to ask yourself questions like who needs to eat? or are we sure we're out of milk? do you really think the kids have scurvy?

Being out of coffee always motivated me to bundle all three up, brush my teeth, load into the car...etc, etc.

A girl needs what a girl needs. Especially when that girl has twins and is exhausted all the time.

Eventually, #1 stopped running away and I also found more stores with bigger carts. Glory, glory! 

 

I have definitely my fair share of "war story" trips to the grocery store, it's just part of being a mom.  I've still never gone to the thrift store with all 3 by myself, I can't even bring myself to think about that. (Shutter.)

Giving up thrifting and the in-and-out quick grocery runs of my youth are a small price to pay for the double blessing of baby twins  :)  Cuteness always wins in the end. At least with this mama!

FQF - You can learn a lot from a 3 yr. old

One of my favorite things about parenting is when your kiddos are old enough to start saying crazy (awesome) stuff. They say the funniest things sometimes. And sometimes they say the wisest thing I hear all day.

About 2 years ago, I was praying with Jackson to heal some little owie of his. He probably spend longer convincing me to pray for this invisible owie then we spent actually praying for it. I prayed for him and when I finished, he puts his hand on my arm, catches his breath, cocks his little head to the side and says

"Mama, I hear Jesus running to heal me!"

Such childlike faith. 

Love.It.So.Much.

Right on, little man, right on.

Happy Friday, enjoy your weekend!

Preethi

We just celebrated her first birthday. Only it’s not what you’re thinking, it wasn’t a joyous day. There was no party, no cake, no balloons.

   

It was her first birthday in Heaven.

Almost a year ago now, my sweet friend went to be with Jesus. I haven’t been able to blog about her life’s impact on my life until now. Truthfully, I was impacted more by Preethi’s death than her life.

This post is very personal and precious to me and I have hesitated to share it, but it’s part of my story now and I pray God will be glorified through it.

Dad was diagnosed in January and that Spring Preethi was also diagnosed. A small, but mighty, crew of us started getting together weekly to pray for them. Some of those prayer times were the BEST prayer meetings I have ever been to.  And as someone who LOVES to pray, I have been to a lot of prayer meetings. My life was changed by praying with those women.

Changed.

In addition to Dad and Preethi, we also prayed for a precious little one still in his mama’s tummy who didn’t have any kidneys. We tackled those 3 “death sentences” with all the faith we could muster and that summer, sweet baby boy was healed! Where there had been no kidneys, there were 2 healthy kidneys. He was going to live. He could be born. Let that sink in. And then give praise to God.

We were encouraged.

Dad was encouraged.

Then he began to decline.

So we ramped up our prayers.

Dad died in September and I needed to take a break from hosting those prayer times.

When Preethi’s health began to decline the following Spring, we began meeting again.  

This time something was different. Something had changed. It was like going from black and white to color. There was an intensity to our prayers I hadn’t experienced before. There were less of our words and more of the Spirit. God was taking us deeper into the battle, behind enemy lines, and we were coming back with victory. Each of us was hearing the same thing from God, again and again; we were so amped up all we could do was to dance and worship b/c victory was ours!!! We knew she would be healed, we knew He had done it on the cross.  

I didn’t actually know Preethi very well before she got sick, but in praying for her, I felt I knew her. There’s something about praying for one another that births an intimacy of relationship. It was a gift and truly my honor to seek Heaven on her behalf.

The Friday evening of Father’s Day weekend, my 1^st Father’s Day without my beloved Dad, Preethi went to be with Jesus. I remember where I was standing in our kitchen when I got the news.

This time it was personal. When Dad died, I was, and still am, completely heartbroken. But when Preethi died, I was just pissed. It was personal this time. It was a loss that seemed to come at a higher cost. That’s how it felt to me. Preethi left a husband and 3 sweet little boys behind. Like I said, personal.

And you know what? It should be personal. We are losing too many dads, moms, little ones, and friends before their time. I want it to feel personal every single time. I want it to feel like my heart is shattering b/c what’s happening matters.  

At Preethi’s funeral, our little prayer crew sat together, “pooling” our faith. We were going to pray for a miracle until our precious friend was buried deep in the ground. We were soldiers and though the battle seemed over, we weren’t giving up yet. I spent the service going back and forth between weeping in grief and pulling myself together, reminding myself that miracles like this still happen!  

Our prayer group met one last time after her funeral to process and pray together. We seemed to have a special bond, like soldiers from the same platoon (or something…) that had experienced the battle in the same way. We needed one another to process the loss. I needed them.

My biggest take away from that time together was said by a friend: “We did more damage to hell than hell did to Preethi.”

To that I say yes and amen. Her life was taken, but she has eternal life now. As we prayed for her, and for Dad, and for baby boy, we stepped just a little more deeply into the Kingdom of God, we understand just a little bit more now of how to pray. And therefore, we will be better equipped to pray next time.

I don’t have any answers. I know what has helped me to understand better these past few years; what has gotten me through some of the grief. I have also been forced into that place of seeking out peace for things I don’t understand surrounding the loss of a loved one. I wouldn’t wish that for anyone.

Once again, I’ll sign off with 2 things I know: God is enough, and I will never regret getting into the trenches and fighting, in faith, for my friend.

Happy Birthday, Preethi

My sweet friend, rockin' her new wig. Man, she was an all star!
So thankful our paths crossed, even for just a few years. xoxo

Some tunage for your Tuesday

Hope you had a great Memorial Day weekend. So nice to have an extra day to be together as a family. :)

Even though the weather was crummy, we packed in the fun this weekend with 2 barbecues, planting our garden, a bonfire, a trip to the zoo, a family nap (even mom and dad!) and a pizza and movie night. On Monday I even made an all American meal, which is quite unusual for me, with grilled marinated chicken, homemade mashed potatoes, green beans, biscuits and cupcakes for dessert. The boys gobbled it up, all four of them!

Now for the tunage. This song is fairly new to me, but I am loving it this month. Be blessed.